Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Is this what true love is like?
I don't understand myself. Not in the least. I'm in love with my best friend. We have been besties for three years now. I love him, even though he probably will never love me the same way, but despite knowing he might never love me back, I still love him to death. I would never want my love for him to destroy our awesome friendship, yet, sometimes I can't help but desire to end our friendship when it seems like he's always choosing someone else over me. And the chicks he chooses over me never treat him well (and I KNOW I would treat him much better than they treat him). I love him so much that it's just painful to endure him loving any one else but me. I don't want my love for him to ruin our friendship, but there are times when I just want it to end because it's too painful to watch him get with these different chicks that treat him wrong. What makes it harder is I feel--really feel--like he's the one, ever since the first day I met him I've felt this way. That fact right there makes it SUPER heartbreaking to watch him fall into these relationships that never last, with girls that don't seem to care for him like I care. I've tried dating other guys, but in the end, I always end up falling in love even harder for my best friend. I've tried ridding myself of these feelings, but hard as I try, I can't seem to. Am I just being a fool? Or should I just keep hanging in there, have faith in my bff, be there for him no matter what? Is this how a person should feel when they are "in love"? Could you even call my feelings for him "true love"? No matter what has happened in the past between us, whether good or bad, I still am madly in love with him, and I love him completely, faults and all. What's wrong with me? Ugh!
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